Don't sacrifice making friends for the sake of grades

By Terrible_Sun_1103

Just browsed through a trove of Instagram Stories - I couldn't help noticing everyone around me leading enormously healthy and active social lives. People heading overseas with their own cliques, doing many fun things together etc. Heck, some of my ex-classmates even invited one another to his/her birthday bashes.

As an only child growing up, I always felt comfortable, maybe too comfortable functioning by myself. In school I never really bothered going the extra mile to mingle around in part due to me being a tad socially awkward; I was also extremely fixated on scoring good grades and therefore didn't want to be distracted by anyone or anything else at all.

Such a lone ranger lifestyle paid off, for a while that is. I scored exceptionally well for my 'A' Levels and consequently landed my dream university course. Looking back though, was it truly worth it? Of late, I came to the realization I barely kept in touch nor hung out with folks from my former secondary school/JC. I do have 2-3 pals who still contact me on occasion but it basically bubbles down to this frustrating situation where these so-called "best friends" aren't exactly proactive, which either meant me rigorously Whatsapping their asses to initiate outings, elsewise it's pretty much quiet on the western front.

A particularly embarrassing moment reared its head earlier this year, when my father suggested throwing a birthday party for me at home. Gee, suddenly I discovered I literally didn't know who to invite (and would actually attend).

Going forward, I shall strive to be more sociable whilst in university in a bid to expand my circle of friends, though frankly I am not keeping my hopes up. I did try to make new acquaintances through volunteer work, then again many youths my age probably already cultivated their own peer networks. Case in point: I once asked to go bowling with a fellow volunteer after he returned from a holiday, but was politely turned down on account that "he would rather do so with his chums".

So please, let my unfortunate, self-inflicted predicament serve as a stark warning to those of y'all who are also like me, prioritising grades over friends. What's the point of faring well academically if you got no one to celebrate your achievements with? Whatever grades attained, remember they are nothing more than mere digits which fade into nothingness with time; bona fide friendships however stay for life.


Death By Loneliness

I reckon I am suffering from social anxiety

Bullied and ignored in sec school, I was once even nearly committed to IMH